The Internet's impact on our Emotional well being!
Don't get me wrong, I love the internet! I use it for many things, from paying bills, booking vacations, social media, to watching my favorite movies/TV shows and downloading music...Don't we all? Well maybe that is precisely the problem!! We have become "dependent" on the internet, which is magnified if you are under 30 years old, however even those in their 40s-80s and beyond, can be impacted!
Lets face it, the internet is it's "own world", so it is easy to lose site of our "real world" when we are constantly connected to it. Add to the fact that we can now carry the internet wherever we go in the palm of our hands via our smart phones, means it is always connected to us, as well. So is this "constant connection" to the internet good for us psychologically? While there are many great benefits of the internet & technology, here are some reasons in my opinion, why the internet can also be unhealthy or even dangerous for our mind & emotional well being (Agree or disagree as you may!):
1-) Feelings of Helplessness & Loss of independence: Losing many of our skills, even simple ones: Simply put, we become lazy!! When we rely on one driving force to run our life, we loose many of the skills & 'know how' to do even basic things. Things that the internet now does for us, have become obsolete. This can even include little things, for instance, "how to write a check and mail it in to said biller." There are people that struggle with this now, after years of online bill paying! Also what on earth is a "travel agent" or a "Record-music-cd store"? Do they even exist anymore? Take technology away from someone who is dependent on it, and they are virtually helpless, almost enough to cause an Anxiety attack!! The person does not know or remember how to live their life without the internet or technology, which creates this profound helplessness!
2-) Instant gratification impacts our anxiety: When we are always connected to the internet, sometimes we live from message to message. "Bing" goes the message notifier on facebook, we have a new "comment", "like" or "message". This greatly impacts our "self esteem" (For the moment)... If we do not get that message or response quick enough, we might start feeling nervous-worried, anxious, "on edge" and figity. Looking at our phone, every minute, to check and double check that we did not miss that message! Once we get it, that pleasurable rush races back to us, boosting our mood, calming us down and temporarily relieving our anxiety, until the next time....The next time? This cycle can often repeat itself relentlessly, dozens of times a day, taking us on a wild roller coaster ride of emotions, throughout the day...All because of a message!
3-) Cyber bullying: For children, teens and yes, even adults, cyber bullying is a reality and a growing problem, almost at epidemic level! Anderson Cooper has chronicled the problem very well, on his CNN show. For kids who face bullying and teasing in school, now often are followed home, virtually, by the bullies. They can be bullied on social media, sent threatening emails, or instant messages. Just putting up with this bullying in school can be enough to cause an Anxiety disorder or serious depression. However, having to deal with it at school AND at home, can make the anxiety & depression significantly worse. For a child who is supposed to feel safe and secure at home, now has this basic security taken away from them, when they are cyber bullied.
4-) People do not socialize in person as much: Why socialize in person, when we can do it in the comfort of our own home? When we got facebook, twitter, Skype...Have a virtual date via skype? Or better yet, taking all your college classes online, and totally give up that college real-world social experience! People often make their friends on online forum-message boards or a cyber video game community. Lets face it, the way we socialize has significantly changed since the internet! The consequence of this is, one, we don't know who we are really talking to on the internet. Also we are losing our ability to make friends in the real world, losing valuable social skills, and the ability to have a face to face interaction or conversation with someone. Also on a side note, shopping malls are losing record amounts of business, since increasing amounts of people do their shopping online. Remember the days people used to go to the mall just to hangout or socialize while doing their shopping? Not much, anymore and it wasn't even that long ago!
5-) A False escape from our "real world" problems: People often create a safe world from themselves on the internet, either through the many cyber games & forums, to watching a movie or tv, this becomes an escape to them from everyday problems. This constant avoidance is never a healthy way to deal with problems in the real world that need to be fixed. Spending more time online, playing a game, will not get your car fixed, it usually won't get you money or income, it won't get your homework done (most likely will impact grades & school performance), it won't ease your mood or reduce anxiety and it won't fix your troubled relationship with your partner, who might be feeling abandoned!
6-) Feelings of entitlement: The internet, particularly Facebook and Technology in general, have also fostered a sense of instant gratification, which reinforces those feelings of entitlement. Feelings of "I want it now and I can get it now!" are reinforced by being able to get things done with lightning fast internet, information is available at a speed never before seen, by previous generations. This creates issues with patience and frustration about not getting what we want when we want it! This also can cause us to take things for granted more easily...Something else that has been trending lately is schools introducing IPAD's into classroom for kindergarten children, that is scary, because the message it is sending is that "They are entitled to an IPAD and have been rewarded with something", without ever having to earn it (The child will see the IPAD as a reward, kind of automatically!). Let the child know the real motive that schools use IPAD's: That it is not a reward, but rather an educational Tool to teach them. It is important to also be aware that this can potentially cause dependence at a very young and vulnerable age. This instant gratification that we experience with IPAD's and technology creates a delusion, especially in the young child's mind that they can have anything at the touch of a button (or screen), and can create serious issues with "learning patience" down the road. This might sound silly, but this really should be explained to and processed with them, so they understand, and are able to successfully develop those patience skills. In the real world, they will need it!
7-) Other addictions manifested through the internet: Online gambling is also becoming an epidemic, facing those who are already vulnerable to addiction. Gambling, which on its own is highly addictive, combined with the ease and accessibility of the internet, now means those who wish to gamble can do so quite easily, from the comfort of their own home, without even leaving the couch! Beats going to a casino, or Vegas! This super availability of online gambling, makes it all the more easy to get drawn into this highly addictive cyber world.
8-) Physical health consequences: Physical & emotional well being are interconnected. People who are not in good health, are generally not as happy. Obesity in this country is at a record high. You simply cannot physically exercise on the internet, (well maybe your mind, you can). All of this sitting, means people, are not exercising nearly enough! Physical activity is at a low and this equates to a record high obesity rate, in the U.S! The internet seems to be a significant force keeping people on their couch & chairs, instead of out and about or engaging in sports-physical activity. This increases the risk of just about every health problem you can imagine; from heart disease, many types of cancers, and stroke. Also, a 2011 UK study on teenagers has revealed too much internet use can even cause brain damage (Article linked below) and affect decision making & memory! Studies have shown that lack of physical activity can also increase the likelihood of depression, lack of motivation & low mood (Also linked below). People with more health problems also tend to be depressed/stressed more, which can complicate the health problems.
SO WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT?
1-) Take notice of impact on life domains: Ask yourself the simple question, "Is my internet usage impacting my relationship with family, friends, my job or school performance, or even my physical health?" "And if so, how is it impacting these areas?" You might have to observe carefully, however just having an awareness of what life domains your internet use impacts is a good first step! Also once you realize what areas of your life are being impacted, you might be more able to see this as a problem and more willing to make the change!
2-) Limit the amount of time spent online: This might sound easier said than done, however one way of limiting the time spent on the internet, is by keeping track of it. Keep an "Internet time log", by simply writing it down on paper. For instance if you spent 3 hours on Monday, write it down. You can gradually try to decrease the amount of time spent online, week by week.
3-) Set a realistic goal for yourself: For instance, if you spent 3 hours on Monday, don't expect that by the following Monday, you will be down to 2 hours. Instead, do it gradually, one day or even week at a time, taking baby steps. A more realistic goal might be: instead of trying for 2 hours the next week, maybe 2 hours & 50 minutes. However, do what works best for you.
4-) Find other things to do to fill the time: The last thing we want is to be bored. Boredom will often lead a person back to their old habits, and ultimately the internet. Find another way to occupy the time. Play a board game, Read a book (You might have to dust it off first!), Do a physical activity, take a walk, and exercise, these are also great stress & anxiety relievers!
5-) Do some of the tasks you would normally do online, in real life: Instead of doing banking online, try doing it in person at the bank? (I know its going to be hard). Instead of buying music or purchasing things online, try going back to the mall or store? This also gets you doing a physical activity which is good for your health and mind! Maybe even have dinner or coffee with a friend, at a cafe? Instead of chatting with them on Facebook or Skype.
6-) Strengthen your family & Social relations: Having a strong family support system or strong real life friendships, a social group or even just one or more close friends, can help significantly in reducing your internet use and increasing time spent with real life friends, family and people in your life. If you do not have close family or friends, doing volunteer work, befriending co-workers or joining a club, group or organization are great ways to network, build social supports & make lasting friendships.
7-) Get professional help: This might help significantly, if you feel these steps do not help you with your dependence to the internet, if things are getting worse or if there is an underlying psychological problem or reason (Such as Depression/Anxiety), associated with your internet use.
To sum it up, It is important to note there is no harm in using the internet in moderation and I am not advocating for anyone to completely give up the internet! There are too many awesome, great benefits of having technology and the internet, however its just as important to be aware of the risks & issues that too much internet usage can cause. Remember, too much of anything can be unhealthy and as long as it's in moderation, there is really no harm done. Personally, I don't expect to be giving up my internet any time soon, just regulating and keeping track of it! The key is being Self aware, realistic and responsible with this powerful ever-evolving technology, that we all make use of, the internet!!
The views expressed in this blog-article are based on both my opinion, observations & some research. In content, this is an opinionated blog, not intended as a professional reference, to self diagnose or substitute professional help in any way, shape or form.
Written By:
By: Dan Blane, MSW, LCSW.
Psychotherapist in New Jersey.
Sources/For more info:
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/internet_cybersex_addiction.htm
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2015196/Too-internet-use-damage-teenagers-brains.html
http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/Depression_and_exercise
Comments
Post a Comment